.
Feedback

Do You Need a Snuggle?

How important is snuggling? People are paying for snuggles. Would you?

Dr. Laurel Schwartz

The question seems to be, not only do you need a snuggle but would you pay for one?  Recently on the news, there was more press on Jacqueline Samuel, a professional “snuggler.”  She charges $60 an hour, for clients to cuddle with her.  She has 100 snuggle positions from which her clients can choose.

Samuel has said, “Cuddling is not about sex.”  Then what is it about?  She touts the physiological benefits of touch – relaxation through our brain’s increased production of serotonin and oxytocin, reduction of stress, anxiety, and the hormone, cortisol, which suppresses the immune system and lowering of blood pressure.

She states more men then women seek out snuggles.  It isn’t surprising from the point of view, that women can get much of their touching needs met through the care of babies and young children, with all of its attendant hugs and kisses.  But Ms. Samuel alluded to also having women clients.  Women need snuggles too. As one woman told me, “You can live with someone and they won’t love you, touch you or even recognize that you’re alive. I also wonder if any of Ms. Samuel’s clients are elderly.  If an elderly person’s spouse is deceased and/or their children and grandchildren don’t live close by, who puts their arms around them? 

Cuddling, however, is more than about touch.  It is about closeness, tenderness and feeling safe.  It is about intimacy.  We have cell phones, texts, instant messaging, Skype, real time and emails.  No one can be separated from their cell phones and you can stand in line getting coffee and hear the most intimate details about another person’s life. That there is a “market” in which cuddles are for sale, suggests that for all our connectedness, we’re not very connected at all and that something essential is missing from our lives.

Indeed, being touched, is well, primal.  Harry Harlow, who was a professor and researcher at the University of Wisconsin – Madison, studied the effects of having baby rhesus monkeys separated from their mothers.  He found, when the baby monkeys were given a choice between a surrogate wire mother and a surrogate wire mother covered with terrycloth, the baby monkeys generally chose the surrogate wire monkey covered with terrycloth. These results go to show not only the importance of touch but even the primitiveness of this need.

So why don’t we cuddle more?  Maybe it’s that our lives are too busy and we fall into bed exhausted, maybe we don’t see an obvious big payoff from cuddling, maybe we have problems with intimacy.  Whatever the reason, the only way some people can get their dose of closeness with its concomitant health benefits is to schedule a snuggling appointment – and pay for it.

For more information, I can be reached at 203-539-1255 or drlaurel@drlschwartz.com.
http://drlschwartz.com/

Glen K Dunbar October 12, 2012 at 02:07 pm
How I wish I could find a friend BFF (Sister) 18-44 who would pay attention to me. Cuddle me. Take my side. Agree w/me. Stand up for me when others put me down.
Rescue me. But, lots of luck w/that one. I know I am doomed to walk the rest of my life in a dark abyss. I especially know that I will not find any comfort around here. Just "tough love" at the most which is what Glen does NOT need. Glen need TLC Nobody Love me. Nobody Care. But, I am forging ahead best I can.
ktc17 October 12, 2012 at 03:29 pm
are you saying that you want your sister to cuddle you?

Newsletter & Alerts

Get the best stories each day and important breaking news

Subscribe

Not from New Canaan Patch? Find your Local Patch »

Note Article
Just a short thought to get the word out quickly about anything in your neighborhood.
Share something with your neighbors. Write a new post... What's up? Make an announcement, speak your mind, or sell something
Thomas Paine June 18, 2013 at 01:46 pm
Why is it the panel for this event does not include a single advocate for gun-owners' rights? WithRead More all due respect to Chief McNamara, why does the panel no include a person who can speak to gun safety from a gun-owning civilian's perspective? ML, you claim that the assembled folks "do not offer judgements about gun ownership" but they are not including a single voice that can offer perspective on gun ownership. I have been to "education" sessions sponsored by Meg's March for Change and they are one-sided indoctrinations into gun control advocacy. >>>> I was in Hartford for the public hearings in January when both Meg and March co-founder Nancy gave their personal testimonies and they all but threatened the legislators on the panel with election day retribution for all those who did not tow the gun-control line of thinking (i.e. March and CAGV). To suggest that Meg "does not offer judgements" if fallacious at best, disingenuous at worst.
Penny Riordan June 10, 2013 at 01:00 pm
Sorry Elmcrest! We don't like the spam either! As Lisa said, our engineers are working hard toRead More prevent those spammers from attacking our 900+ sites across the country.
Elmcrest June 11, 2013 at 07:45 am
Good luck! Just today, Tuesday, June 11, there have been over 350 of those spam posts since 3:30 AM,Read More and it’s not even 8:00 AM yet!
Ed Smith June 13, 2013 at 12:02 pm
Yup, "US Open Golf" is doing it right now, posting a new blog every 2 minutes.
Diane McEvoy June 18, 2013 at 09:48 am
US Representative Larson is now on board, which leaves Rep. DeLauro and Senator Murphy. Neither ofRead More their staffers are forthcoming about why they have not co-sponsored. Please call their DC offices and urge them to stop up. Murphy has supposedly received only 40 calls on the subject.
monique thomas June 7, 2013 at 05:14 pm
Unknown to most parents, children’s data is being shared beyond the school district with sixRead More agencies inside the Utah Data Alliance and UTREX, according to Utah Technology Director John Brandt. The student data is further being “mashed” with federal databases, according to federal Education Dept. Chief of Staff Joanne Weiss: http://blogs.edweek.org/edweek/inside-school-research/2012/07/ed_urges_states_to_make_data_s.html While John Brandt assures us that only a handful of people in Utah have access to the personally identifiable data of children, recent alterations to federal FERPA (Famly Education Rights Privacy Act) regulations which were made by the U.S. Dept of Education, have radically redefined terms and widened the window of groups who can access private data without parental consent. For more on that, see the lawsuit against the U.S. Dept of Education on the subject: http://epic.org/apa/ferpa/default.html But first, an interjection: I want to introduce this article: http://seattleducation2010.wordpress.com/2013/01/02/your-students-privacy/ I like this article because it exposes the facts plainly, that parents are unaware that their children’s information is being shared without parental permission, beyond the school, beyond the district, and even beyond the state. It is verifiable and true. What it means: Courses taken, grades earned, every demographic piece of information, including family names and income, is being watched by the U.S. government via schools. Verify for yourself: The U.S. Dept. of Education’s own explanation is here, showing why SLDS systems exist: http://www2.ed.gov/programs/slds/factsheet.html
Tasin Sumaia June 9, 2013 at 01:55 pm
http://directwatchliveonline.blogspot.com/2013/06/watch-france-vs-brazil-livestream-online.html
1CarGarageinNC June 6, 2013 at 06:16 pm
Why does ANY of this surprise you? You can take the man out of Chicago... Where is the outrageRead More across the land? Why do we sheepishly respond to these multiple malfeasances? Obama will stay in office and do what he wants until 2016 for one reason. Two words. President Biden.
Glen K Dunbar June 7, 2013 at 02:49 pm
I have and always will respect whoever our Pres was/is and will be. Is one person over the otherRead More really going to change my life?? NOPE. I am still going to be spinning my wheels in poverty. As for IRS> I think IRS should be closed too. Nobody wants to pay taxes. Why can't the Govt just print more money Problem solved!! Also, USA needs to stop wasting money overseas and take care of our own...like my bail out
Marie-Pierre Graf June 5, 2013 at 04:55 pm
I feel so blessed to have had those 37 great young people in my life for the last 3 years! I willRead More miss them so much!
Four Jacks June 7, 2013 at 03:49 pm
Really, why even have a tab called "news"' it's all fluff for the mat part.
Four Jacks June 7, 2013 at 03:49 pm
Most part.
Elmcrest June 7, 2013 at 11:50 pm
Well, Patch does have this going for it: hundreds of semi-literate spam phishing posts per hourRead More about televised international soccer matches from multiple fake posters. Hundreds! Reading Patch is like walking through the ruins of a once thriving metropolis.