Towns Take Aim At Cyberbullying

Sgt. Matt Brodacki of the Weston Police Department, who investigates cyberbullying and other web-related crimes,  is forbidding digital holiday gifts for his son if the devices could link him to the Internet.

That's easy enough for Brodacki: his child is two.

But for others with children in the tween and teenage years, the challenges of keeping kids safe from cyber crimes can be numbing, especially with cell phones, texting and digital photographing and videography omnipresent.

A perception that the problem is pervasive, serious and escalating led community and school organizers to present a forum for seven area towns on Thursday at Saxe Middle School in New Canaan.

"If something seems like it's wrong, it is," Brodacki told the mostly adult audience of nearly 300.

He spoke of a recent episode in New Canaan in which a teenage girl exposed herself under pressure from three youths with a webcam. The camera was seized before the images could be disseminated around the planet.

In Weston recently, he said, a student photographed members of a swim team undressing in a locker room; that time, as well, a swift complaint to the police stopped potential Internet dissemination.

"I've asked a group of fourth graders, 'who among them had seen nudity on the Internet', knowing fourth graders are brutally honest," the police officer said. "They all raised their hands."

"Our children are becoming desensitized at an early age," he added.

To social welfare professionals, what may start out as innocent youthful pranksterism can lead directly to domestic abuse in adulthood.

"The age of innocence is over," said Dede Bartlett, co-chairwoman of the New Canaan Partnership Against Domestic Violence, who helped organize the forum.

"Even third-grade girls are texting and spreading rumors and photos," she said. "Every kid in every school knows someone affected by this problem."

"Girls can be especially catty in high school," Brodacki said.

A digital texting issue at New Canaan High School last year "rose to the level of a lot of girls being angry at each other. We made it a school-wide issue," said New Canaan principal Tony Pavia.

"There's no school in the U.S. that's immune from this," he added. "And let's face it: one of the roles of teenagers is to push limits."

Sgt. Carol Ogrinc, New Canaan Police communications and youth officer, has investigated seven incidents in New Canaan during the past year involving computers and cell phones.

These involved "shock sites," sexually inappropriate photographs, videos and messages, she said. One involved a 12-year-old posting an "inappropriate" video on the Internet with a message referencing a teacher. The children involved in all seven incidents were between 12 and 15 years old.

"The action I take can range from a verbal warning to a referral to Juvenile Court which is the equivalent of an arrest," Ogrinc wrote in an email. "I also have the option of referring a case to our Peer Jury, which is something we implemented 1 ½ years ago."

In each of the cases Ogrinc investigated this year, she issued "stern verbal warnings" to the offenders.

"Along with that, I made it clear that if there is a complaint made in the future, that has a much greater chance of being referred to court," she added.

So what is a parent to do?

The consensus from the forum comes down to  basic common sense: Be a good parent and have healthy relationships with your children. Do not deny them age-appropriate use of digital media, but tune in to what they're doing on a regular basis.

"Kids are scared. There's a digital divide," Bartlett added. "Have your kids teach you how to use the new technology and let it be a bonding session."